Small Car Syndrome

T

here’s one thing that my good lady wife has noticed about my driving the Ka: I’m more aggressive. I am starting to revert back to the way I was with the Cinquecento.

This is probably due to a number of reasons. One has to be the way the Ka drives and handles - that is, very well. It dives into corners aplomb and has plenty of grip. It is huge fun to punt about. The other is how other road users treat the Ka: it’s a small car, and therefore it cannot get out its own way. All the more reason why I should be a bit more defensive, perhaps?

The Ka is quite a rare breed for a mass produced car, in that it usually extols some form of emotional reaction to its presence. It’s either a love it or hate it shape. You can see it in peoples faces - some are thinking, “ew, ugly car, what’s he doing in it” whereas others are thinking, “aw, how cute, a baby Ford.” Or similar. The Fiesta, or Corsa, or even the Clio just don’t seem to get quite the same reaction. This can lead to traffic light bullying, or other cars pulling out in front of you as you trundle along the main road at 60. It can also lead to people being very inconsiderate at junctions - something that I find very difficult to tolerate!

This, of course, makes things worse when an anti-Ka driver finds you in the way. And it’s not always blokes, either. Perhaps drivers are jealous of the Ka (surely not?) but sometimes, I get the feeling that I am being tailgated because I’m in a Ka, rather than I am holding somebody up.

The Solution?

I suppose the solution would be to drive about in a Fiesta if you don’t want this reaction. Otherwise, embarrassing the individual behind isn’t a solution - but is entertaining nevertheless!

Hard up boy racers do seem to be particularly prone to this sort of behaviour. One sunny Saturday afternoon, we were being tailgated through the 40 limit on the approach to Monks Cross shopping park just outside of York, with an off-red XR2 a good foot off our rear bumper. As we approached one of the smaller roundabouts, I knocked the Ka into third, but didn’t slow down - kept him going at 40. We’re approaching from six o’clock if you picture the roundabout as a clock face. As we approached the roundabout, Charlie’s feet went for where the brake pedal would have been, had she of been driving. Heh heh heh! The XR2 is still very close behind as we start to turn in on the roundabout, but he takes a wider approach, using the other lane. We start to go around it, and all I can hear is the squealing of protesting tyres - but they’re not ours! The road surface changes just before the second exit, at one o’clock, and all four of the Ka’s tyres chirrup as we go over it - then we’re back on track for our three thirty exit, still at 40 mph! Nice! The XR2 driver did follow us around, but lost speed through the roundabout (which he promptly put on once he’d left) and was soon crawling all over Kermit’s chrome exhaust pipe. Ah well. But at least I had the satisfaction of listening and watching his car struggle over the roundabout.