Ka Duels

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iven the speed restrictor fitted to the Ka (a mechanism operated by my right foot), there are still occasions when another driver “has a go.” More often than not, I’m just not in the mood for it (and life is too short to worry about the annoying kid in his Nova). When I’m using the cruise control system I have the excuse that I’m happy at the pace I’m at...

I’m sure that there are plenty of drivers out there who think that the Ka’s handling is rather dismal: and this number must be falling as time goes on! On occasions, I am doing my best to disprove this theory. Things have improved in this respect with the kid’s strut brace, wider track with the XR2i wheels and Ford Racing Suspension.

The first time I noticed this “gerrout ma way!” sentiment was north of York, approaching the Moors, when some young chap in an original Corsa. This was the SRi model, and the driver was both tailgating and popping-out (see here), then decided to turn on his lights. I’ll stick to the speed limit, which invariably means 30 in the villages and 60 elsewhere. The Ka certainly couldn’t out-accelerate the Corsa (it was an L-reg one, so would have been powered by Vauxhall’s 82 PS 1·4i-8 engine), and I was clearly starting to annoy this chap because I wouldn’t exceed 60. In the end, he gave up trying to overtake, but contented himself with following suit. Annoyingly, for him at least, we started to inch ahead in some of the hillier, twistier stuff, perhaps because he was unsure of the road (well; Corsa, twisty stuff, perhaps he was trying hard after all). He did overtake us on a stretch of dual carriageway, and he had a very long run up, so by the time he overtook us he had bags of smash.

Another common thing that the Ka suffers from is “roundabout bullying.” Who knows the A1 around Worksop? There are several roundabouts within a few miles. As is ones want, cruising along at 70, we’re overtaken by a chap in a smoky old D-reg. Escort 1·4. At the roundabout, he arrives at just the wrong time and so has to stop for traffic already on the roundabout. We arrive a bit later and can just keep on going, by both luck and judgement, and with hindsight much to his disappointment. About half a mile later, he overtook us again but the same thing happened at the next roundabout, except this time he had just moved off by the time we reached it. Unfortunately, this oaf blocked off both lanes so we couldn’t overtake him, causing some heavy braking to avoid running in to the back of the Escort! As we left the roundabout; around 5,500 rpm from the Ka in second and third, the bonnets level, up until about 70, when the Escort eased in front since we hit the speed limiter /my foot/. With all that CVH smoke - thank goodness for air re-circulation!

The B1225 is a road that I derive a lot of pleasure from. It’s also a road where anybody with a bit of power under their right foot can speed along, at least, on the straight bits. Indeed, it doesn’t take any grey matter to push the accelerator pedal harder. But there are some parts of the B1225 where sensible overtaking is impossible - this side of a supercar - because visibility is severely restricted. In such cases, you’re condemned to following the vehicle in front, and at driving at their pace.

This usually isn’t too bad: I’ll maintain 60 as much as I possibly can, but of course, I have to slow down for the junctions.

On one occasion in December 2001, I was travelling south to Lincolnshire when a brand new red Golf came charging up behind us. I had spotted his turn on to the B1225, but he was overhauling us at some rate of knots, and promptly positioned himself just a few metres behind the Ka’s bumper. I hate tailgaters!

Now I would imagine that driving that close to a car at 60 or so it rather tiring, not to mention, of course, that it is downright dangerous. I was not looking forward to having an aggressive driver this close behind, but after a few moments, he did pull back as we took the gentle climb up towards the copse. As we went over the top, he had a look, but decided not to overtake. Indeed, for the next couple of miles, for all his posturing and road positioning, he didn’t overtake - which had me thinking.

It’s difficult to tell the base model Golfs apart. The 1·4 looks like a 1·6 looks like the SDI looks like the TDI 90. It could have been any one of these models, and if it is either the 1·4 or the SDI, it’s fair game for the Ka /evil chuckle/.

You arrive at three junctions, reasonably close to one another. The third one crosses the main road, the A16, and then takes you up and over the Wolds. At the third junction, I accelerated hard as we went around the tight right hander, up the hill, then over the left. Up into third, and I kept my foot planted until we reached 60 once more. The Golf driver was also going this way, but didn’t tackle the corners with such gusto, catching up around half a mile later. It was tempting to increase speed, but no. It’s not wise to be pushed when you don’t want to, so instead, I’ll let this guy stew for a bit.

He continues to try to drive in a menacing manner, which really isn’t on (it’s no fun being tailgated by somebody who either lacks the nonce, or the power, to overtake). He is showing no signs of easing off either, so I merely continue to make progress at the speed limit. Finally, he decides to flash me! That’s funny. Now the sensible option would be to pull over and let him pass - life is too short to wind people up unnecessarily - which I try. He doesn’t overtake. Well the second option is to lose him.

So I did.

And in the morning on the way to work, the number of people who deliberately get into the wrong lane just to save a few seconds at traffic lights (by pulling in front of cars, then swerving into their lane) amazes me. The most determined are usually ladies, and often in modified cars (unfortunately those with big dents in the side), perhaps from previous experiences. Drivers of large, luxury cars also try to bully their way in front of the Ka (even if they don’t have leather trim!) – see Small Car Syndrome. For the most part, I can put up with idiots, but sometimes, just sometimes, I do find myself approaching the limit of my patience. The selfish woman driving this car tailgated me through the A19 leaving York, in the 30 limit then the 40 limit, pulled back when I accelerated to 60, then charged up to tailgate me. Finally, after a mile of popping out (see here for what this means), she overtook. Just to slow down to about 58 indicated.

Heavy Goods Vehicles

Now as everybody knows, heavy goods vehicles are restricted to a maximum of 60 mph, and in most cases, just 56 mph.

Take a look at this picture on the left. See it? Like it? We’re being overtaken on the M1. Now have a look at the speedo.

Can you see? Would you like a closer look? Yeah, I thought so!

This picture below shows a close-ups of the original picture, taken as the HGV overtook us.

It’s showing 65 mph.

Well, okay, yeah so the Ka isn’t the quickest vehicle around, but I’m not embarrassed about this heavy goods vehicle overtaking us. Not in the slightest. We were loping along at 65 on our return journey from Ford Fair 2002. We were north of Silverstone on the M1, and we’d just descended a reasonably long, steep hill, so the HGV had bags of smash as the road flattened out.

A Smart (and it must have been modified!)

This one got away from us, I freely admit it!

It looked standard, and I had no reason to assume that it was anything but a standard Smart, except it had more go than us.

We’d both pulled off the A52, with the Smart behind Kermit, and heading towards the M1. At the top of the slip road, down into second, and extend – snatch third at around 50 with this silver and black thing still right behind us. At this point, I invited Charlie to grab the camera. We pull on to the motorway and he’s off! L

Now I’ve driven many a Smart, and none of them have subjectively or objectively felt quick enough to see off a Ka at these sorts of speeds. On paper, they’re not able to do this either. Smarts are reasonably easily tuned, so I can only speculate that this one was modified in some respect! Nice that it looked standard!

I also speculate that the 86 mph speed limiter wasn’t working on it either, because it disappeared into the distance very quickly indeed!

The Rover Turbodiesel

On the way up north to Crail Raceway with some time pressure, I came upon a Rover 218 turbodiesel just outside Ponteland, on the A696, the Borders Crossing. The gentleman in the Rover appeared to have just finished work, it was around five thirty in the morning, and was on his way home, happily pottering through a series of gentle bends at around 45 mph or so. Kermit and I were making good progress through the twisty stuff, having to decelerate for the Rover. There were some roadworks, and of course, each and every light we came to was a red one... and stayed red for two or three minutes. Not good when you’re wanting to make good progress!

As we left the roadworks behind, the Rover was still trundling through the twisty stuff, but increasing speed to 60 for the straight bits and not using main beam - thus I am not able to see much beyond his lights with a view to overtaking. After a few miles of this, we come to another twisty section, and he starts using main beam to see. As we emerge from a gentle open left hander, forty five, my first overtaking opportunity emerges - there’s about a mile of straight road. Move out, have a good look, start accelerating... no chance to overtake, since the Rover starts sooting and accelerating! Git!

I’m happy with his adopted cruising speed, because we’re making reasonable progress, and in the straighter bits there is no scope for overtaking given the pace. We’re still hanging in there, much quicker in the twisty stuff and keeping pace in the straighter stuff. He’s starting to brake later and harder so I’m guessing that he’s getting frustrated with this car keeping up behind him. And he’s also starting to use both lanes - crossing the solid white line in places - presumably to keep the pace up. With a set of car headlights maintaining station behind.

Daybreak arrives, and the Rover’s pace increases still further - at the time, I speculated that he had managed a visual ID on the Ka and was trying to shake me, heh. We’re making the climb up towards the Borders, and he’s slow through the corners but making full advantage of the superior torque and climbing ability of the turbodiesel up the gradient. Kermit simply can’t keep up; indeed, I’m slipping back despite holding on to as much of my speed as I can through the corners. The Ka just hangs on to the road, but it won’t go any quicker up the hill. He’s tackling the corners at speeds that Kermit isn’t fussed with, indeed he’s taking them slower than I would even without being in a bit of a hurry!

Over the top, we come to the twisty hill ascent, just the far side of the Border Crossing, and I’m overhauling his ass at a rapid rate of knots as he’s down to twenty five or so in the twisty corners. But at every straight, he’s hard on the power, then hard on the brakes for the next corner; it’s all I can do to keep in contact, since I have no opportunity of overtaking on the corners, and can only keep pace in the straight bits (I reckon he’s toying with me on the straight bits).

In every village leading up to Jedburgh, he speeds through whilst Kermit heats up his brakes to go through at the 30 or 40 limit!

Finally, he turned off at Jedburgh, and had a good look at me as he did so.

Lake Como

During the Italian Job Road Trip, Charlie and I visited Lake Como. Now Lake Como is an especially pretty part of Northern Italy and is notable from a driving perspective of having some wonderful twisty roads. The villages have a speed limit of fifty kilometres per hour (just over thirty miles per hour) and away from the urban areas, there’s either a speed limit of seventy kilometres per hour (approximately forty five miles per hour) or the standard Italian road limit of ninety kilometres per hour (fifty six miles per hour).

We were making respectable time across one particular stretch of the road, sticking to fifty kilometres an hour during the villages and driving up to either the speed limit or visibility limit outside the villages, whatever was lower.

I digress. We stop at some traffic lights and an Italian pulls up behind us in a black BMW 3-series Tourer (the estate). When the light goes to green we move off and stick to fifty kilometres per hour, we’re in a village. Once free of the limit we accelerate up to the visibility limit and I’m driving moderately aggressively. He’s tailgating, but I don’t consider this too much of an issue because he’s bound to overtake when able and roar off into the distance.

Well he does overtake half way through a village on the approach to a blind bend, then pull in to drive through at a speed barely above fifty kilometres per hour.

And as we leave the village I resume my previous pace and he’s slowing us down. So we follow at a distance, giving him some space but keeping up through the twisty material.

Now it’s rather unusual to have somebody armed with a camera when something like this happens, but this shot shows the BMW driver nailing it as we leave. How did I know he was nailing it? If you know your six cylinder BMW 3-series, you’ll know that they have a twin exhaust (similar in appearance to Kermy’s PowerFlow, but a bit smaller, heh). Under moderate load only one pipe is used, the second only opens up (with rather more noise) under heavy acceleration – and his 2·2 litre inline six was making lots of noise.

He pulls away for a little bit until we catch up, slowly but surely over sweeping bends and rather quicker when it’s quite tight, as shown here.

His driving is getting more and more erratic as he starts braking harder and later and he’s using both lanes, but we’re still overhauling (apart from the straight bits, where he exceeds ninety kilometres per hour).

Anyway after six or seven miles of this, the poor BMW driver gives up and pulls into a lay by to let us pass, then drives off behind us but a bit slower this time. We didn’t see him again! J